Thanks for joining me – please be aware that the posts contain explicit language and sexual content. Guidance for those under 18 and for those of an easily offended, delicate nature.
Turning thirty was a shock to the system. My life hadn’t panned out as I had expected. I thought I’d be entering my 3rd decade of life with my long-term partner, looking to buy the house together in the suburbs with a view to get married and pop out sproglets. A text one day changed that. After a messy night out with the girls, consuming my weight in gin, I returned home to an empty house and a new beginning.
The break-up was for the best. We were no longer in love and were plodding along, hoping one day the spark would re-ignite. Who were we kidding? Sex is not the most important thing in a relationship, no. But to not have it at all?! I became asexual during the last year of our relationship, forgetting I had sexual needs.
Was I sad post-breakup? Sure! For a week. As hard and cold as that sounds, the relationship had been over for many many months before we got to that point. I felt excited about potentially meeting the man of my dreams…
I soon learnt that although the grass is greener, I was going to have to hack my way through a shit ton of weeds to get there!
Names have been changed to protect identities!
“Online dating is just as murky and full of lemons as finding a used car in the classifieds. Once you learn the lingo, it’s easier to spot the models with high mileage and no warranty.”